Aquadsblog.blogspot.com Website Review

hello everyone!  i cannot believe it's been so long since i've posted.  for anyone that cares, i apologize.  let's just say life i've had a crazy day, which i will post about later, but in the meantime here are two new videos from last night.  painting is something that i've wanted to try for the longest time and yesterday and i finally did!  probably only did it for an hour or so but i august 18 marked four years that i have now been paralyzed.  i've been wanting to write a blog but to be honest, i really don't know what to write.  what am i supposed to say?  some people celebrate this day like it's their second birthday.  the day they got their second chance.  the day they did not die.  how uplifting.  call me pessimistic and no offense to those who might feel that way, but i think it's pretty stupid.  what about the other 364 days i didn't die.  yay!  let's go back to august 18, 2009.  i can't walk.  i cannot breathe on my own.  i don't know if i'm going to live or die.  i'm so drugged up i really don't understand the severity of what's taking place.  whenever i do come around i have family and friends looking down at me.  why am i in the hospital?  i was just in the ocean.  i remember hurting myself and not being able to move but that's ok, it's probably just a stinger or something and i will be ok in a little bit.  they probably just took me to the hospital to make sure everything is cool..  i will be moving in a little while.  i just need a rest.  but if that's the case, why are these tu*es down my th*oat?  why can't i talk?  why can't i feel anything below my chest?  why does my neck hurt?  i don't understand the need for the iv because again, i really shouldn't be here too much longer.  but wait.  why is my cousin, who lives in california, here?  that's really nice of him but i don't get it.  too many questions going back and forth in my mind.  feeling pretty tired.  it's a nap time.  things will probably be better when i wake up.  bring on more drugs!