Greenlawnpresbyterianchurch.org Website Review

extend a special welcome to those who are crying newborns, skinny as a rail or could afford to lose a few pounds. We welcome you if you can sing like Andrea Bocelli or can’t carry a note in bucket.  You’re welcome here if you’re “just browsing,” just woke up, or just got out of jail. We don’t care if you’re more Presbyterian than John Calvin or haven’t been in a church since little Joey’s baptism or Sally’s wedding after which everybody,including poor Sally, got drunk. We extend a special welcome to those who are over 60 but not grown up yet, and to te*nagers who are growing up way, way too fast.  We welcome soccer moms, NASCAR dads, starving artists, retired fa*mers, hedge-fund managers, tree-huggers, latte-sippers, vegetarians, computer nerds, and junk-food eaters.  We welcome those who are in recovery or still addicted- some of us have also been there.  We welcome you if you’re having problems these days or have had “issues” your whole life long.  We welcome you if you’re down in the dumps or if you don’t like “organized religion”- we’ve been there too.   We welcome you if you’re “spiritual but not religious,” and if you are curious whether it is possible to be both If you blew your offering money in a football pool or on online betting, you’re welcome here.  We offer a special welcome to those who think the earth is flat or was created, literally, in seven days.   We welcome you if you work too hard or don’t work at all.  We welcome you if you have a PhD, but are working now at Trader Joes, or if you can’t spell and the job you do have is killing you.  We welcome you if you’re here today only because grandma is in town and wanted to go to church and you just didn’t want to We welcome those who are inked, pierced or both.  We offer a special welcome to those who could use a prayer right now, maybe especially because they had religion shoved down their th*oats as kids or by someone they worked for after they grew up.  We welcome you if you