Zenhumanism.blogspot.com Website Review

i'm an atheist, and that's it. i believe there's nothing we can know except that we should be kind to each other and do what we can for. before i complain about my suffering, i might do well to examine myself. i might be surprised by the amount of pain i can release. you can’t spend too much time in recovery before you hear people say things such as, “pain is inevitable, suffering is optional,” or the tried, true and tired slogan, “let go and let god.” in fact these and others may have instantaneously come to mind before you were even through reading the quoted pas*age above. the question is am i heeding the wisdom behind these statements? i especially have trouble with “let go and let god.” given my troubled relationship with god or just the concept of god, when someone invokes deity or a higher power my eye starts twitching and i fall into a giant sinkhole of despair. i hit bottom in a person hell of my own making; the fires of which are stoked by my stubbornness and intellectual arrogance. i get hung up on language a lot. i use it to keep from listening to the sharing of others. it makes a great excuse, but that is all it is. i’m simply refusing to listen and work on my own growth. it’s an act of fault finding that shifts the focus of recovery off of me where it needs to be.  the first time my sponsor said, “you need to let go and let god,” i protested loudly. over and over again he would tell me that i was simply hanging on to more than i needed to. i didn’t need to bear the burden. i chose it daily and most likely preferred martyrdom to happiness and health. i wanted accolades for suffering with what i thought was grace. in this situation i earned my suffering. the painful experience that precipitated was often long over, except in those cases where i chose to keep at it, such as a dysfunctional relationship. i used to love provoking people into treating me badly. what i continue to learn is that so much of what i experience as suffering is the result of grasping tightly to things that no longer